THE UNDERGROUND

I'm planning a trip!

This March, I'm going to visit my sister, who lives in Brooklyn. But, I've been thinking, why go all the way across the country, and waste the opportunity to see more of it? So instead of taking the plane, I'm thinking of either driving or taking the bus.

Here's my plan: Start out in Boise. Then I go to Louisiana. Then I go to New York. Then I go to

Maine. Then I go to Michigan. Then I go to Alaska. And then, finally I go home.

I'm planning on being gone for a week. I'm also planning on not using hotels during the trip. I've kind of lost faith in the whole hotel system. I don't want to use a hostel, though, because come on, I'm not dumb, I can tell it's just "hotels" with the "s" moved to the left a little.

I certainly don't want to sleep on the ground seven nights in a row. Been there, done that. So what I've been thinking, is that I'll use this secret system which is commonly referred to as "The Underground". It's kind of like the underground railroad from the mid-1800's, except instead of being used for slaves to escape to Canada, it's a system that helps young assholes find couches to sleep on. The way it works is you find somebody who's part of the network, and they let you sleep on their couch (or in their bed, if they fancy you). Then, the next morning, you tell them where you're driving to that day (you can't tell them the night before--you don't want to risk the information getting out) and your host gives you contact information for the next place you'll be staying at.

The Underground is totally free, which makes it totally awesome! The only problem is, I have no idea how to get in touch with these people. (I also have no proof that the Underground exists, as much of my intel on it comes from drawing wild conclusions from people's stories about couch-hopping.) If anyone knows how I can get in contact with the Underground, I'd be very grateful. A phone number would work best, for if they have an office you can call or whatever.